...crossroad that only I seem to understand.
And I guess that all that should matter....
Today I was given my new phone by Him. Which meant I had to see him. We met at McDonald's because going to his house would not have been good for me. Its too comfortable. We discussed a lot of issues that were around when we were together and when were in the limbo state that we were. We discussed when things start to turn for the worse, and how things might have gone there.
We came to the conclusion that he wants us together and will not have us any other way, and I don't want to be in a committed relationship now, although I don't want him out of my life. All and all this was the hardest good bye of my life.
I am still confused about everything. There are a few thoughts that keep popping in my head. The main one is that maybe we will get back together someday. After I am done finding out if this is really where I need to be( in terms of being single).
I realize that I have been painting a picture that everything was bad in my relationship although for a while we were in a very rough spot and choose to end it. But after being with someone for so long, its like a marriage and I don't believe in divorce.
So I am at a cross road, in terms of what the future is for me and him. Right now we are no longer at all, and it pains me. But at the same time, after 5 years being single is a nice change. Meeting new people with out having to feel some type of way about it is nice.
Maybe right now I need to explore this life a bit more, before I jump back with him. And maybe after time has passed my head will be more clear.
But I cant lie and say I don't miss him tho.... He is still my love.
Friday, July 30, 2010
yup so
Thursday night I made plans with Car( i really want to say his name that is how annoyed I am), to get some drinks after I got off work.
I worked a 10 hour shift, and was very tired but after work I got myself ready to go anyway. I text him when I got out and he responds a half hour later. I tell him that I am by my job( which is very close to where I met him). He ask how long would it take to get back to BK, because he is in his house in Midwood. [ sidenote:I thought we had planned to meet when I got off work, why are you just chilling in the house.] So, I say 20 mins. I ask where in BK did he want to meet. I suggest downtown or in Fort Greene because that is easy enough for the both of us to go home after. [side note: I am assuming he still has a car,even if he does not, every train is down there.] He ask if we could meet in East Flatbrush....ummm that is no where near me, I cant even take a train from there back to my house. So I'm guessing he wants this to be convenient for him, screw the female that would have to get home at what ever hour with a little liquor in her system.
So I let him know that it is too far. He ask about meeting Friday, I had already told him I was going out of town, two day prior. Im not going anywhere but I did not want to double book. I remind him that I am going out of town. He proceeds to grill me and ask what time would I be back( while I am asking if he wanted to pick a better location, or if he wanted to bother at all). I say late, heres the doozer, he then says will you be free around 7. Now...if I said I will be getting back late, does that mean more on the lines of 7 pm or maybe 10-11 pm. Just saying...
Moving on.... He then ask where will I be going( what...is that any of your business, your not coming). I ask again( this all takes place while I stand by the train entrance) if he wanted to go out tonight. He says how long will it take me to get into BK.....DAMNIT did I not already say 20 mins. He says too soon hes not dressed. WTF, what the hell was he doing the whole time we were going back and forward texting.
Finally feed up I tell him, we will have to make plans for another time at a later date. Basically me saying deuces you are dismissed.
I can take the lateness of Mr. A, even Jersey hooking up his friends( he wants everyone to be happy, can not completely knock him too much). But silly stuff like what Car pulled is a big fat NO. Sorry....
in the words of my beloved B.Scott..... Bitch Boo Bye
I worked a 10 hour shift, and was very tired but after work I got myself ready to go anyway. I text him when I got out and he responds a half hour later. I tell him that I am by my job( which is very close to where I met him). He ask how long would it take to get back to BK, because he is in his house in Midwood. [ sidenote:I thought we had planned to meet when I got off work, why are you just chilling in the house.] So, I say 20 mins. I ask where in BK did he want to meet. I suggest downtown or in Fort Greene because that is easy enough for the both of us to go home after. [side note: I am assuming he still has a car,even if he does not, every train is down there.] He ask if we could meet in East Flatbrush....ummm that is no where near me, I cant even take a train from there back to my house. So I'm guessing he wants this to be convenient for him, screw the female that would have to get home at what ever hour with a little liquor in her system.
So I let him know that it is too far. He ask about meeting Friday, I had already told him I was going out of town, two day prior. Im not going anywhere but I did not want to double book. I remind him that I am going out of town. He proceeds to grill me and ask what time would I be back( while I am asking if he wanted to pick a better location, or if he wanted to bother at all). I say late, heres the doozer, he then says will you be free around 7. Now...if I said I will be getting back late, does that mean more on the lines of 7 pm or maybe 10-11 pm. Just saying...
Moving on.... He then ask where will I be going( what...is that any of your business, your not coming). I ask again( this all takes place while I stand by the train entrance) if he wanted to go out tonight. He says how long will it take me to get into BK.....DAMNIT did I not already say 20 mins. He says too soon hes not dressed. WTF, what the hell was he doing the whole time we were going back and forward texting.
Finally feed up I tell him, we will have to make plans for another time at a later date. Basically me saying deuces you are dismissed.
I can take the lateness of Mr. A, even Jersey hooking up his friends( he wants everyone to be happy, can not completely knock him too much). But silly stuff like what Car pulled is a big fat NO. Sorry....
in the words of my beloved B.Scott..... Bitch Boo Bye
Disclaimer
First, when I read back on some of my post, I think I may sound a little harsh...or judgemental of these men. This is not what I am trying to be. I do point out their good qualities and their bad. Plus I have to make this blog juice, otherwise you all would not care. So here is what I have to say about the two men that I am still(i think) talking too. Mr. A, some of you have meet him and have given me good reviews....thanks I like him too. Jersey, he is a real cool dude, and I am looking forward to meeting him later today( that's if it is still on...). That is all I have to say about those two for now
Second....I think I fell in love with a garbage man that was riding the back of the truck down Fulton street on my way home from work. Crazy, I know, but would you all have me any other way.
Third...please remember that I am not a writer, so excuse the grammatical errors....muah
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Is this not about you and I....
Two post ago, I explained that I plan to meet up and have my first date with Jersey that did not involve other people. He asked me to cook, I don't cook on Saturdays but I said maybe, depending on how the date goes. Friday comes and I ask( all via text) what were the plans for Saturday. Shorty says I thought you were going to cook. Ummmmm.
So basically shorty made no plans for us....despite him saying he wanted to show me a good time. smdh Its not like I was expecting much, drinks or even a movie would have been fine. I don't seem to understand. Why ask someone out, and not make plans. If you want to wing it, then say that,I would have no problem.
I moved past that, we tried to make plans the day of but it never worked out...but this Friday we have plans to go to a party....I am sure he will know other people there so I will bring one girlfriend along that he has not meet(get to that in a minute) just in case I get ditched.....which will really " grind my gears"(cue family guy).
Now here's the reason why I have to bring a friend that he does not know. The past two times that I have meet up with him, he has been trying to hook his friends up with my friends. That is all he seemed to be concentrated on. Even on the day we were suppose to meet up, he asked if one of my friends planned to join because his friend wanted to see her again. Like is he serious. He does not even know me yet, why is he not focusing on trying to get to know me instead of hooking up his friends with girls that are clearly not interested.
I just don't understand. That has been a turn off, but being who I am, I am going to give it another shot. Despite trying to be Mr. Matchmaker, he did introduce me to a nice spot. If he ask me if my friends want to talk to his friends again, I will have a problem. Because that is not cool....at all.
I hope we can finally have a first date...
So basically shorty made no plans for us....despite him saying he wanted to show me a good time. smdh Its not like I was expecting much, drinks or even a movie would have been fine. I don't seem to understand. Why ask someone out, and not make plans. If you want to wing it, then say that,I would have no problem.
I moved past that, we tried to make plans the day of but it never worked out...but this Friday we have plans to go to a party....I am sure he will know other people there so I will bring one girlfriend along that he has not meet(get to that in a minute) just in case I get ditched.....which will really " grind my gears"(cue family guy).
Now here's the reason why I have to bring a friend that he does not know. The past two times that I have meet up with him, he has been trying to hook his friends up with my friends. That is all he seemed to be concentrated on. Even on the day we were suppose to meet up, he asked if one of my friends planned to join because his friend wanted to see her again. Like is he serious. He does not even know me yet, why is he not focusing on trying to get to know me instead of hooking up his friends with girls that are clearly not interested.
I just don't understand. That has been a turn off, but being who I am, I am going to give it another shot. Despite trying to be Mr. Matchmaker, he did introduce me to a nice spot. If he ask me if my friends want to talk to his friends again, I will have a problem. Because that is not cool....at all.
I hope we can finally have a first date...
Friday, July 23, 2010
I just want to say
God places people in you life for a reason, the reason may be discovered until years after the person has entered, and maybe left, but there is a reason.
This past week I have found the reason why God decided to place certain people in my life. For those who were there for this past week, where I learned thing about a person that I thought I knew better, I want to say Thank you. I needed each and everyone of you all shoulders and ears. Although this person is like kyptonite for me. I want to thank you all for the advice and encouragement.
Besides learning why some people are in my life. I am relearning that often the heart doesn't follow its leader, which the dictionary calls the brain.As I sit and listen to the playlist I have made especially for this situation( currently listen to Torn by Letoya Luckett, I have always liked the song, but now I love it). After all that has happened, basically me finding proof for something that I knew, the heart is still tugging at the thought of at least listening to what he has to say. Why, I have not a clue, sadly I still love him which is not good right now. I still have this maybe in the future thought that pops up every now and then; despite all my efforts to suppress it and ignoring speculations of my friends. The thing is, no matter how much I love him, part of me knows he is not for me. ( currently listening to Not Anymore by Letoya Luckett, this girl is on it) For years I spent time with someone who once made me happy all of the time, but at some point this person changed, or rather maybe showed his true colors, which in turn made me sad. Yet for some odd reason(not really) I still care, I save all of the text so I can re-read them, if he doesn't call I begin to wonder....
Basically I am at a place of limbo, I don't know what I should do. I know that I do not want to get back into a relationship...NO...but do I want speak to Him, do I want to speak on the phone or face to face?
I need to decide.
This past week I have found the reason why God decided to place certain people in my life. For those who were there for this past week, where I learned thing about a person that I thought I knew better, I want to say Thank you. I needed each and everyone of you all shoulders and ears. Although this person is like kyptonite for me. I want to thank you all for the advice and encouragement.
Besides learning why some people are in my life. I am relearning that often the heart doesn't follow its leader, which the dictionary calls the brain.As I sit and listen to the playlist I have made especially for this situation( currently listen to Torn by Letoya Luckett, I have always liked the song, but now I love it). After all that has happened, basically me finding proof for something that I knew, the heart is still tugging at the thought of at least listening to what he has to say. Why, I have not a clue, sadly I still love him which is not good right now. I still have this maybe in the future thought that pops up every now and then; despite all my efforts to suppress it and ignoring speculations of my friends. The thing is, no matter how much I love him, part of me knows he is not for me. ( currently listening to Not Anymore by Letoya Luckett, this girl is on it) For years I spent time with someone who once made me happy all of the time, but at some point this person changed, or rather maybe showed his true colors, which in turn made me sad. Yet for some odd reason(not really) I still care, I save all of the text so I can re-read them, if he doesn't call I begin to wonder....
Basically I am at a place of limbo, I don't know what I should do. I know that I do not want to get back into a relationship...NO...but do I want speak to Him, do I want to speak on the phone or face to face?
I need to decide.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Finally some action again
Besides this job I have that consumes me, I have not gone out on any dates. That was until this past weekend
Well it was not really a date since I was with my friends, but Jersey invited me. He introduced us to a nice chill spot in Brooklyn. My friends and I are definitely going back there before the summer is up. The nice thing about Jersey that day was that he brought my two friends and I drinks. Nice of him since he didn't have to and certainly didn't have to buy them a damn thing. He claims his purpose is to show me a good time. Which he did in a way since everything was free and the vibe of the place was real nice.
The next day at the mih BBQ, we meet up but didn't speak for long. Everyone from Brooklyn was there. Had to mingle
Now on to the next man...
I meet a guy who I will name Car, on my way to work the other day. It was raining outside, so I barely had time to speak to him. We were suppose to meet tonight when I got off of work, but he backed out claiming the weather was going to be bad. He's from Miami, and I'm going to assume he doesn't really understand NY weather. Lighting without thunder and clouds does not always equal rain. And you cant not completely trust weather.com.
Maybe we can meet up sometime soon, although Saturday I am suppose to spend the day with Jersey....
Oh and btw, I have not had my make up date with Mr. A. Although he maybe slightly scared of my now. After I found out about Him, I called Mr.A and told him that he needs to set a date for us to go out then fuck the shit out of me. If he doesn't then we are no longer speaking. Yea I know it was crude but I was mad, and I need to have sex bad. Real good sex, my mind and body needs to be calmed down in the best way possible.
Well it was not really a date since I was with my friends, but Jersey invited me. He introduced us to a nice chill spot in Brooklyn. My friends and I are definitely going back there before the summer is up. The nice thing about Jersey that day was that he brought my two friends and I drinks. Nice of him since he didn't have to and certainly didn't have to buy them a damn thing. He claims his purpose is to show me a good time. Which he did in a way since everything was free and the vibe of the place was real nice.
The next day at the mih BBQ, we meet up but didn't speak for long. Everyone from Brooklyn was there. Had to mingle
Now on to the next man...
I meet a guy who I will name Car, on my way to work the other day. It was raining outside, so I barely had time to speak to him. We were suppose to meet tonight when I got off of work, but he backed out claiming the weather was going to be bad. He's from Miami, and I'm going to assume he doesn't really understand NY weather. Lighting without thunder and clouds does not always equal rain. And you cant not completely trust weather.com.
Maybe we can meet up sometime soon, although Saturday I am suppose to spend the day with Jersey....
Oh and btw, I have not had my make up date with Mr. A. Although he maybe slightly scared of my now. After I found out about Him, I called Mr.A and told him that he needs to set a date for us to go out then fuck the shit out of me. If he doesn't then we are no longer speaking. Yea I know it was crude but I was mad, and I need to have sex bad. Real good sex, my mind and body needs to be calmed down in the best way possible.
men....are theyreally worth it
So I found out something devastating things about Him, so bad that I cant deal with him any more. He has broken my heart yet again. And to think, I was considering putting an end to my single life and actually give him another try in the future. But that of course is now down the drain.
My main pet peeve is that, everyone knows what you do in the dark will eventually come to light. Me and Him are not together, so there was no need for him to hide stuff for me. He should have just come clean about all of his lies. He honestly had nothing to lose. Shit I would have respected him more...but now fagetabotit...
I don't think I have ever been so mad before in my life. I refuse to go into details about it, but I'm sure some of you have figured it out.
The funny part is that he is still trying to contact me. When there is honestly nothing left for us to say to each other. Sure he has somethings of mine, but I have already made arrangements for them to be picked up or dropped off by a friends house. so I no longer have to see his trifling ass.
I am going to end here and pick up again later because I am starting to get mad all over again. But I will leave with the best line I have ever heard by my dear friend Abebi Subria( had to name her because I told her to patent this phrase). " Niggas are not even worth a pile of my own shit...I'll save it for the toilet".
BEST LINE EVR
My main pet peeve is that, everyone knows what you do in the dark will eventually come to light. Me and Him are not together, so there was no need for him to hide stuff for me. He should have just come clean about all of his lies. He honestly had nothing to lose. Shit I would have respected him more...but now fagetabotit...
I don't think I have ever been so mad before in my life. I refuse to go into details about it, but I'm sure some of you have figured it out.
The funny part is that he is still trying to contact me. When there is honestly nothing left for us to say to each other. Sure he has somethings of mine, but I have already made arrangements for them to be picked up or dropped off by a friends house. so I no longer have to see his trifling ass.
I am going to end here and pick up again later because I am starting to get mad all over again. But I will leave with the best line I have ever heard by my dear friend Abebi Subria( had to name her because I told her to patent this phrase). " Niggas are not even worth a pile of my own shit...I'll save it for the toilet".
BEST LINE EVR
Saturday, July 17, 2010
i like him...i really do
So, I like Mr. A. I really do, but he is pissing me off with his lateness. Now I am a notorious CP time kind of girl, however I am never as late as he is. I get it, he has to take his family places, they come first. But when you make plans with someone do not run 3 hours late. The first time mmm maybe, second time I'm bugging for even agreeing to go out. Third time hell no.
Granted he does inform me of why he will be late while it happens. But I'm a sick of it always happening. I know I should have said something and I thought I did, I guess I didn't make my point known well enough. I guess it is because I like him, but damnit I do not like waiting for stupid amount of time. Sorry. Scratch that I am not sorry.
Well Mr. A, I have been trying to be nice me, now I am going to have to let you see a little more of me. And I'm sorry you are probably not going to like it...
Granted he does inform me of why he will be late while it happens. But I'm a sick of it always happening. I know I should have said something and I thought I did, I guess I didn't make my point known well enough. I guess it is because I like him, but damnit I do not like waiting for stupid amount of time. Sorry. Scratch that I am not sorry.
Well Mr. A, I have been trying to be nice me, now I am going to have to let you see a little more of me. And I'm sorry you are probably not going to like it...
Friday, July 16, 2010
A venting moment...
So the past few days have not been the greatest for me. I know some of you read this blog to see who I am going on a date with and what crazy adventure I might be going on. But today I just need to get a few things off my chest....
1. I want to say thank you to those who talked me back to reality when I was about to back slide with Him. For a quick second, I somehow gave him control while he was venting and I let it go to my head. Well I am back now and still single.
2. I recently got another retail job( I tried my damnest to stay away). Well lets say, although I
am glad I have a job, I hate it already. I took the job because I needed a part time gig since I will be going to school at night and have an internship on top of school. The main reason is because I need some money.
Here's my problem, what is the purpose of working to get money, if you don't have time to buy or do the things you want. Since you don't make enough money to pay your bills and to buy clothes for work, and you work too much to even enjoy the fruits of your labor.
As a part timer I always work the closing shift. Meaning I go in at 2 and do not leave until 9. After spending 7 hours on my feet, I am too tired to do anything. I can barely watch TV.
Tonight a few friends were going to a free party, I got dressed and ready to go, when I realized I had to be to work the next day, and then I started thinking of all the things that I needed to get done, and then I thought about the bills I had to pay, then I thought about how I don't make enough money. By the time I finished thinking of everything I was too depressed to go any where.
WHAT A HORRIBLE LIFE!!!!
I know I am having myself a pity party for now, and I am sure that next week I will most likely not give a fuck and just go out. Since I cant let this horrible job control my life. But right now....its not happening.
1. I want to say thank you to those who talked me back to reality when I was about to back slide with Him. For a quick second, I somehow gave him control while he was venting and I let it go to my head. Well I am back now and still single.
2. I recently got another retail job( I tried my damnest to stay away). Well lets say, although I
am glad I have a job, I hate it already. I took the job because I needed a part time gig since I will be going to school at night and have an internship on top of school. The main reason is because I need some money.
Here's my problem, what is the purpose of working to get money, if you don't have time to buy or do the things you want. Since you don't make enough money to pay your bills and to buy clothes for work, and you work too much to even enjoy the fruits of your labor.
As a part timer I always work the closing shift. Meaning I go in at 2 and do not leave until 9. After spending 7 hours on my feet, I am too tired to do anything. I can barely watch TV.
Tonight a few friends were going to a free party, I got dressed and ready to go, when I realized I had to be to work the next day, and then I started thinking of all the things that I needed to get done, and then I thought about the bills I had to pay, then I thought about how I don't make enough money. By the time I finished thinking of everything I was too depressed to go any where.
WHAT A HORRIBLE LIFE!!!!
I know I am having myself a pity party for now, and I am sure that next week I will most likely not give a fuck and just go out. Since I cant let this horrible job control my life. But right now....its not happening.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
sorry for not posting more
This new job of mines requires me to work stupid hours like 2-9 everyday...so much for a summer for me. I'm praying everyday that a better job comes along, QUICK.
But anyway, this job is putting a damper on my men meeting :-/. However I do have some good news, a friend of mines will be setting me up on a blind date. Well, I don't know how much of a blind date it will be since she claims I've meet him before. But of course with my memory I most likely wont remember what the hell he looks like. (BTW if anyone else wants to set me on a blind date I'm down with it) We are suppose to be double dating with my friend and her boo. With this crazy schedule of mines, who knows when I will be able to have this date. URGHHH
This is will be my first blind date ever, and I don't really know the rules. Is it like every other date. I don't know what to wear!!!! Should I wear something black...mmm not in this heat. OK so color...but what color...so much to think about. On top of finding the time for this to happen.
Besides my potential blind date, Jersey and I might be meeting up on Sunday(one of my only days off this week). There's some kind of BBQ in prospect park...the exact plans haven't been made to a tee yet. By Saturday they should be and of course I will let you know.
Last but not least, my friend and I are having a singles mixer next Friday the 23rd from 6-12. Message me if you or a friend would like to come.
That's all for now, I will try my best to update more...as soon as I get my new phone( who knows when that will happen).
But anyway, this job is putting a damper on my men meeting :-/. However I do have some good news, a friend of mines will be setting me up on a blind date. Well, I don't know how much of a blind date it will be since she claims I've meet him before. But of course with my memory I most likely wont remember what the hell he looks like. (BTW if anyone else wants to set me on a blind date I'm down with it) We are suppose to be double dating with my friend and her boo. With this crazy schedule of mines, who knows when I will be able to have this date. URGHHH
This is will be my first blind date ever, and I don't really know the rules. Is it like every other date. I don't know what to wear!!!! Should I wear something black...mmm not in this heat. OK so color...but what color...so much to think about. On top of finding the time for this to happen.
Besides my potential blind date, Jersey and I might be meeting up on Sunday(one of my only days off this week). There's some kind of BBQ in prospect park...the exact plans haven't been made to a tee yet. By Saturday they should be and of course I will let you know.
Last but not least, my friend and I are having a singles mixer next Friday the 23rd from 6-12. Message me if you or a friend would like to come.
That's all for now, I will try my best to update more...as soon as I get my new phone( who knows when that will happen).
Sunday, July 11, 2010
umm yea
so jersey had our mual friend ask me if he could have my number....I told her yes, and shortly after the sent me a text....hmmm.....
There's more going on in my life, but right now I need time to sort some things out...
There's more going on in my life, but right now I need time to sort some things out...
Thursday, July 8, 2010
should I?
So I was reading today's post over at untiligetmarried.com, and the blogger talked about women going for be the guy that doesn't call and ignoring the guy that does. This of course got me to thinking.
For a couple of days I have been thinking about what may have happened with Jersey, see a few post below. Well after a third brief text conversation, he did not hit me back up. While this is OK, (maybe I should just chuck it up) I find myself thinking, why hasn't he text back...or even more...should I text him( the last "conversation" ended with me tell him to hit me up later, meaning the ball was in his court...right?). Would I look like the thirsty girl if I were to hit him up with a hi, or would I look like the girl that may be interested in him....idk.
Then after reading the post, I thought about what happened with 6'9. He consistently called me almost everyday and I did not answer his calls. Granted, I no longer wanted to talk to him because of the strange "date" we had, and if it had happened to be good I probably would have continued to see him. However, I could have given him another shot, or at least answered his call and not have placed him in the thirsty box. He was obviously very into me, where as Jersey is not(or so I think).
Well, I will hopefully learn from this, and next time I would give it another shot, maybe....
But here is my question, should I hit up Jersey?
For a couple of days I have been thinking about what may have happened with Jersey, see a few post below. Well after a third brief text conversation, he did not hit me back up. While this is OK, (maybe I should just chuck it up) I find myself thinking, why hasn't he text back...or even more...should I text him( the last "conversation" ended with me tell him to hit me up later, meaning the ball was in his court...right?). Would I look like the thirsty girl if I were to hit him up with a hi, or would I look like the girl that may be interested in him....idk.
Then after reading the post, I thought about what happened with 6'9. He consistently called me almost everyday and I did not answer his calls. Granted, I no longer wanted to talk to him because of the strange "date" we had, and if it had happened to be good I probably would have continued to see him. However, I could have given him another shot, or at least answered his call and not have placed him in the thirsty box. He was obviously very into me, where as Jersey is not(or so I think).
Well, I will hopefully learn from this, and next time I would give it another shot, maybe....
But here is my question, should I hit up Jersey?
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
shame
This will be a quick post....
A couple of nights ago after partying, I went and fulfilled a booty call with Him( got needs people). Well he didn't have his car so I ended up spending the night. ( I will post later about my feelings on that) So in the morning of course, I have to go home...but wait....I still have on my short behind dress from the club the night before..... :-O!
So, I had my first walk (or cab ride) of shame. With his sweat pants, hiss tee and my pumps, I took a cab back to my house. smh....
A couple of nights ago after partying, I went and fulfilled a booty call with Him( got needs people). Well he didn't have his car so I ended up spending the night. ( I will post later about my feelings on that) So in the morning of course, I have to go home...but wait....I still have on my short behind dress from the club the night before..... :-O!
So, I had my first walk (or cab ride) of shame. With his sweat pants, hiss tee and my pumps, I took a cab back to my house. smh....
its been a long time
Damnit!
So I met up with me ex ex...(get it). We went out to eat, but before that he came inside my house, and he started to do all the things Ive been wanting him to do.
Here's the deal with him, we were together for a good minute, but we never had sex(although we did do other things, if you get what I mean). But we have remained close since our break-up, although we have not seen each other since.
We talk to each other about A LOT, damn near everything. So to see him again and spend time with him was real good. Although I always try to act like I don't want us to, you know,do that do...I really want to( notice its still in present tense). Things would have gone down...if it wasn't for the cock blocking of someone I call mother.
But its OK( not really). Hopefully it will happen one day, or maybe its just not meant to be....
By the way, while out to eat, 6'9 called...again..for like the 100th time. I have not answered his calls in damn near a week. This time after he called, I had my ex ex call him back. HAHAHA, well sad to say that broke 6'9's heart. He even expressed his feelings on facebook. Lame...
I don't understand how someone could be so attached when we have only gone on one date, and had one real phone conversation. I guess that unbelievable quick peck I gave him goodbye sent him through the roof. Poor thing.
So I met up with me ex ex...(get it). We went out to eat, but before that he came inside my house, and he started to do all the things Ive been wanting him to do.
Here's the deal with him, we were together for a good minute, but we never had sex(although we did do other things, if you get what I mean). But we have remained close since our break-up, although we have not seen each other since.
We talk to each other about A LOT, damn near everything. So to see him again and spend time with him was real good. Although I always try to act like I don't want us to, you know,do that do...I really want to( notice its still in present tense). Things would have gone down...if it wasn't for the cock blocking of someone I call mother.
But its OK( not really). Hopefully it will happen one day, or maybe its just not meant to be....
By the way, while out to eat, 6'9 called...again..for like the 100th time. I have not answered his calls in damn near a week. This time after he called, I had my ex ex call him back. HAHAHA, well sad to say that broke 6'9's heart. He even expressed his feelings on facebook. Lame...
I don't understand how someone could be so attached when we have only gone on one date, and had one real phone conversation. I guess that unbelievable quick peck I gave him goodbye sent him through the roof. Poor thing.
Friday, July 2, 2010
just a thought
I had a brief and I mean brief text conversation with a dude, and since then things have seemed to fizzle out. While this is OK, I find myself wondering why. This one, although I do not know him well, seemed to be different from some of the others.
I won't go into details about why it might have fizzled out( I want to, but something is telling me not to....if you want to know just ask me personally). But I will say this, although I am well traveled, college educated, well read to an extent, and have a good head one my shoulders, do not assume I know everything. Forgive me, but how is a person suppose to know about something, if they have not been taught or even shown. Instead of making a face or judging based upon that, explain to them what it is. I am sure there are a few things that they can teach you too.
I used to be the type of person who would right someone off with a quickness. Now I know you maybe thinking, "what about CM". There is more to that story that I posted but unfortunately had to take down. And I have been considering giving him another shot, at least on a friendship level( yea I said it, to those who know the whole story).
But back to what I was originally saying. People need to start learning from each other, and introducing others to things they may not know. I'm sure not everyone wants to be taught, but as the teacher at least you did your part.
Just a random thought....
I won't go into details about why it might have fizzled out( I want to, but something is telling me not to....if you want to know just ask me personally). But I will say this, although I am well traveled, college educated, well read to an extent, and have a good head one my shoulders, do not assume I know everything. Forgive me, but how is a person suppose to know about something, if they have not been taught or even shown. Instead of making a face or judging based upon that, explain to them what it is. I am sure there are a few things that they can teach you too.
I used to be the type of person who would right someone off with a quickness. Now I know you maybe thinking, "what about CM". There is more to that story that I posted but unfortunately had to take down. And I have been considering giving him another shot, at least on a friendship level( yea I said it, to those who know the whole story).
But back to what I was originally saying. People need to start learning from each other, and introducing others to things they may not know. I'm sure not everyone wants to be taught, but as the teacher at least you did your part.
Just a random thought....
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